Pain

Here I go again,
I'm going insane,
I feel like I'm dying,
And I've never been lying.
Struck by a needle,
I'm stuck in the middle,
Of this overwhelming pain,
Of regret and shame.
Trust pushed aside,
This hurt does abide,
Outside, I'm alive,
Inside, well, goodbye.
I cry at night,
In plain sight,
For the different kinds of pain,
That, everyday, drive me insane.
I'm not crying for you,
I'm pissed off my mind too.
And at the same time,
I realize what's mine.
That pain, it gets to me,
Everyday, it gets to me.
It's not something I can say bye to,
Although as much as I want to.
I try to deny it,
And not follow it.
I'll say this with no lie,
I don't want to die.
I dream of it every night,
The pictures won't come out of sight.
I know it's for a purpose,
But this pain isn't harmless.
I just want it to end,
And a new voice, I will lend.
I want to change the world,
And not be shut down by my own self.